Archives---June, 2006
June 30, 2006
...In the same vein as the exasperated mothers who have disposed of untold millions of dollars worth of baseball cards in shoe boxes beneath the beds (next to the August, 1973 issue of Penthouse) of their Teengenerate sons, if a set of loafs had been meticulously preserved, what would they fetch on eBay today? Or is that loaves? Suttle World does not recall if that issue of syntax was ever fully resolved and officially entered into the Mit)h Speak Style Book. Now there's a compilation project for the enterprising gentle surfer. It does not escape Suttle World that raising these issues serve only to hone the laser sighting dot now affixed squarely in the center of the upper torso.
...And since we're strolling down Memory Lane/Ho Chi Minh Trail, Suttle World has a question/suggestion for many a gentle surfer. When's the last time you extended your forefinger, placed it to your lips and moved it in a vigorous up and down/superior and inferior motion while emitting a monotone? Been a while, huh? Give it a shot. Its akin the bicycle riding deal. Suttle World guarantees a good giggle at the least, perhaps even a true guffaw. Feel free to reacquaint yourself with the exercise in the privacy of your own bathroom or some such. With greater confidence, you can break it out on occasion with family and friends. Then its on to the crowded elevator.
...Yep, he's desperate for material this morning.
...Suttle World looks at the machinations of the markets yesterday and shakes its head ruefully. Is it perhaps time for an intelligent discussion about the need for the Fed as opposed to simply letting the markets set interest rates? Monetary policy is, unfortunately, a necessary evil, and probably still requires a governing body, but this Pope Bernanke/Greenspan stuff may have to go.
...The final day of the second quarter also marks the final day around Tucker for nephew Ridge, as he prepares to travel to Savannah to spend a week with his sister, niece Jessica. Though he will be missed, his absence affords the opportunity to finally redo the bathroom in the west wing of stately Roberts/Suttle Manor, and throw away baseball cards of immense future value along with 1973 issues of Penthouse.
June 29, 2006
...All arrived safe and sound yesterday evening following a most pleasant afternoon at the brand new ballpark that is West End Field in Greenville, SC. Excepting the grunge, it is indeed a replica of Fenway Park in regard to the odd field dimensions, etc... It certainly rivals any of the many bush league venues visited over the past several years. Pics forthcoming. Suttle World also is more than willing to entertain offers from the Greenville Drive should they require a manager. There had to be a right hander somewhere in the bullpen to bring in (such as your right handed closer) to protect a lead with men on base and a right handed .350 hitter who was 3 for 4 before hitting the 3 run homer that gave the visiting Lexington Legends a come from behind win.
...Over 200,000 people evacuated in the mid Atlantic due to flooding is a staggering number. When all is said and run off, the region will have quite likely have been through the proverbial 500 year flood deal. Portions of western North Carolina (including those proximate to the Suttle World satellite offices) received nearly 10 inches of precip that came to an end shortly before our arrival Monday. The Bounty guy has got to be getting tired by now.
...No doubt to the chagrin of many, Suttle World fell a single vote shy in the Senate Wednesday of ceasing publication. Had the idiotic flag amendment passed, Suttle World would be unable to continue with its daily maintenance. First, it would be preoccupied with changing the morning routine to that of burning American flags in the north 40 of stately Roberts/Suttle Manor; and then its off to prison where internet access is rumored to be limited. One more time ("with feeling"): the First Amendment's free speech clause is there to expressly protect political speech. Moronic though it may be, burning the flag is political speech if ever there was any, and violates no other citizen's rights to life, liberty or property. Spare me your judicial activism routine. If protecting an individual's rights under the First Amendment is judicial activism, then Suttle World is all for it. Beats the hell out of mob rule that is what the blatantly pandering failed legislation was. If the Congress is dead set on playing with the Constitution, Suttle World respectfully suggests it start with repealing the 16th and 17th Amendments. Then we can talk.
...Also no doubt Suttle World will be engaged in a rousing chorus of "Happy Birthday" to commemorate the 50th anniversary of the interstate highway system later this morning as it inches around I-285. Ike made the right choice. Its his predecessors (both state and federal) that have turned many parts of the country (especially the ATL) into Tasmanian fusterclucks. Perhaps Suttle World can pass the time sitting in traffic by burning a flag.
June 28, 2006
...Burt was great. A more cogent review to come, but suffice to say that one doesn't require 50 pieces when 2 of the 8 are keyboards/synthesizers (in addition to Burt's Steinway). Add three long time superb vocalists, a well chosen set list, a most pleasant venue, and one has a wonderful evening that proved well worth the nearly 40 year wait to see the 78 year old sell it big time. A good time had by all , and still no teenagers have been killed in the making of this adventure that shall terminate today with a trip to the ball park in lovely Greenville, SC. The mini-Fenway should provide an excellent photographic subject, but a sign in next door Hendersonville will no doubt be the July pic of the month and dwarfs the "Wooden Nickel Dollar Store and Internet Cafe" sign on a convenience store near stately Roberts/Suttle Manor. ETA: late afternoon, so we may bask in metro Atlanta traffic that we have missed so terribly in the last 48 hours.
June 27, 2006
...Short and sweet this morning as Suttle World publishes from the relaxed, cool and wet that is the current status of the western North Carolina satellite headquarters of Suttle World. Though often damp, the shlep up the mountain was uneventful, and at this writing no teenagers have been killed in the making of this trip. Alas, there is plenty of time for such activities prior to and following the appearance of Burt Bacharach tonight in nearby Brevard.
...Tough night for the Tar Heels of UNC as they gave away a national championship (again), dropping the final game three 3-2 to the Oregon State Beavers in the CWS.
...Now go play nicely among yourselves. Hey, I'm on vacation here---amuse yourself with your own sage witty repertoire if need be. Reviews of tonight's show and tomorrow's foray to mini-Fenway in Greenville on the return leg coming soon to a browser near you.
June 26, 2006
...And they're off. Yes, this morning marks yet another sojourn to the western North Carolina satellite offices of Suttle World, and for the first time in recent memory, no rental vehicles will be leased in the making of this adventure. Instead the second great show of the summer and culmination of nearly 40 years of waiting comes to fruition Tuesday night with the appearance of Burt Bacharach at the Brevard Music Center. Suttle World knew not of the BMC until discovering this particular performance several months ago. Turns out to be quite the mini-conservatory, with a summer session for students now entering its 8th decade. A check of the seating diagram leaves Suttle World to believe the hall can hold no more than a thousand, so it should be as intimate an atmosphere as one can have with a 50 piece orchestra, vocalists, etc... The usual suspects, including nephew Ridge and buddy Alex in tow embarks on the journey late this morning, with a return Wednesday though Greenville, SC to catch a Greenville Drive game at the new mini-Fenway in a "Business Men's Special"/noon game. Suttle World should continue publication during its travels. Despite the anticipated rain, the trip up should be direct with a short stop at the scenic overlook near the NC/SC border where the aforementioned teens can be shown Suttle World's favorite place to dispose of lifeless bodies. Just in case. And props to cuzin Phil for his house sitting, menagerie minding duties in our absence.
...First its off the be outfitted for uniform gear at nearby GPC. Suttle World shall not complain, knowing how the dry cleaning industry has gotten over on the fairer sex for many years, but does have trouble understanding why men's extra small clothing is priced 25% higher than the same Orson Wells sized piece for women.
...Six months of college hard ball ends tonight as Carolina and Oregon State face off in a deciding game 3 of the CWS---7:00 (EDT), ESPN.
...Wiffle Atlanta shifted indoors yesterday to complete some play during a very rainy Sunday. Though far from a long term solution, the Rehoboth Presbyterian Church's gym proved more than adequate to get in a game and a half. Lynnwood Lee went out with a fury, striking out 10 (including the first 7 hitters he faced) in a mercy rule shortened Hurricanes win over the Expos. In the time shortened nightcap, the Senators trail the Expos 4-1 after three innings completed.
June 25, 2006
...Email service finally restored to gene@genesuttle.com --- your primary contact for Suttle World. The problems began Wednesday when the site host began a "migration" (a term Suttle World believes to mean handing over their/Powweb's stuff to whomever bought them out several months ago). Restoration of the home page will probably wait until mid-week---allowing for both more dust to settle from said migration and the itinerary of Suttle World.
...If its Sunday it must be Wiffle Atlanta time. Actually, if its Sunday, convenient and everybody happens to be in town, its Wiffle Atlanta time; and such is the case today for the Suttle World Senators who will make their second consecutive full squad appearance of the season today against opponent(s) TBD (determined by what's convenient and who happens to be in town). Looking for their second straight victory as well, skipper Suttle will give the rock to young nephew Ridge for his first start of the season in an effort to both get the young gun some innings and perhaps give the ball club some wiggle room in its pitching rotation.
...Ok, momma's gone, and dad's various papers will fetch $35 million (probably more if you went the eBay route, but then you gotta pay fees and go through the hassle of shipping, etc...). Props to you whomever you are. Much has been made in the local media about the Sotheby's deal and a group of "anonymous Atlanta business leaders" stepping up with the aforementioned bucks to keep the quite rightly deemed sacred documents/papers of Rev. King off the auction block. What amuses Suttle World is that there is never any mention as to whom a check for $35 million will be written. Inquiring minds want to know. Best we can figure, the kids will split it up as well they should, but absence of such information is a real rib tickler. One can only hope they manage their personal affairs in a superior fashion to those who have tried "running" the King Center.
...Suttle World didn't make it through the rain delay, but awoke to find Carolina up 1-0 over Oregon State in the CWS final. Game two tonight, 7:00 (EDT), ESPN. Unmentioned in the coverage that was seen last night was any mention of the death of Walter Rabb in April at the age of 91. Rabb coached the Tar Heels for 31 years and holds every record in the book, including two trips to Omaha. Rabb was head coach in Chapel Hill the years my father, who died less than a month later, made the ball club as team manager---a much easier job than hitting a curve ball I was told, but worthy of a varsity letter.
...Primary email address problems or not, running R Dean Taylor up the flag pole should have brought some communiqué by well published alternate email, phone, messenger or semaphore. Speaking of SOTD, shout out to Texas correspondent Matt Bruner for today's selection as well as the video link.
June 24, 2006
...Allegedly fixed but unproven, regular email service has supposedly been restored. The bad news is that the Powweb folks indicate that they cannot salvage/restore email sent over the past 72 hours. Ergo, the gentle surfer with urgent news should attempt once again to communicate. Keep those cards and letters coming. So much for the seamless migration of the site from wherever to wherever as promised. gsuttle@comcast.net remains an alternative at present and in the future should other problems arise.
...Friday night marked the beginning of that traditional interleague Texas cage death match rivalry that is the Braves v. Devil Rays, and 11 innings later Atlanta snaps its 10 game losing streak---actually holding the lead through the bottom of the 11th!
...Close to 4 million folks have stumbled into the metropolitan statistical area that is Atlanta to now call it home. The population occupies an MSA (the most populated MSA in the country---all 7 cities with larger populations are known as Super MSAs or SMAs) that encompasses a "huge tract of land" that cannot be seen across with the telescopic aided eye literally because the curve of the earth interferes with the sight line. Why the sprawl (for the benefit of yall that aint from around here or the clueless denizen)? Simple, there are no tangible natural boundaries within 100+ miles of downtown Atlanta. No mountains, major lakes (in fact there are no natural lakes in the entire state of Georgia---the largest east of the Mississippi), oceans, etc... The population quadrupled over the past 30 years and folks just kept moving a little farther out to get more bang for their buck in the housing market, etc... What has gone largely unnoticed or unmentioned is that there is indeed a boundary for the area: a reliable supply of potable water. Metro Atlanta and many points south and west of the city (see Alabama---if you must) have a single source, the Chattahoochee River (no aquifers for you!). Various outdoor watering bans have surfaced in metro counties as drought like conditions have once again visited the region. Get to the point!!! The bottom line is that there aint enough of the wet stuff to go around, and the economist in Suttle World will be most interested and probably amused at how this plays out in the coming decades. Allowing market forces to work is probably out of the question, given it would most likely result in drastic price increases for consumption and promote conservation measures such as the use of "gray water" systems that are currently outlawed by most jurisdictions. Given that half of current consumption is for outdoor watering, that single shift would "fix" the problem for the foreseeable future.
...The University of North Carolina Tar Heels play for the NCAA baseball title this weekend against the unlikely Oregon State Beavers. A defacto best of three series by virtue of both teams being undefeated in the double elimination College World Series, game 3, if necessary will be played Monday at 7:00 (EDT)---the same start time as games one and two set for this evening and Sunday. ESPN will carry the first two, with ESPN2 picking up the third. Neither school has ever won a national championship. Perhaps there is something in the aforementioned water with regard to baseball. Georgia Tech and the Braves have a whole lot in common when it comes to post season play, excepting that Tech's regular season excellence has had a longer run, and has collected no titles, while the Braves have been awarded a single ring.
June 23, 2004
...Suttle World continues to experience difficulties with the good folks at Powweb, the host of genesuttle.com since its inception some three years ago. Given this is the first issue that has arisen in said time, Suttle World will attempt to maintain a patient demeanor for the time being. Email is an especially tricky issue, in that somehow the primary email address (gene@genesuttle.com) was deleted. Until such time as the issue is rectified, the gentle surfer is encouraged to use gsuttle@comcast.net as an alternative for contact.
...The death spiral that is the Atlanta Braves keeps auguring closer towards the ground having now reached mach 10 and counting---the longest losing streak in 18 years. The inside baseball term for the Braves bullpen is that it cannot suck enough, now having blown at least half of its three dozen or so save opportunities for the season. 15 and a half games behind the first place Mets, and trailing two other marginal ball clubs---this is getting real ugly boys and girls.
...From the mailbag this morning comes NOTHING, because they deleted my damn address!
...Email regarding the stellar SOTD selection (taken straight from the "back of the rack of stack of wax, all designed with you in mind") can be forwarded to the above referenced address. As an aside, in checking the date for the tune, Suttle World had an erroneous notion corrected. Seems that ole Dean was the first white artist signed by Motown. Suttle World was under the impression it was Rare Earth---by far their most successful white act judging by the fact that a Rare Earth label was subsequently created by Gordy.
...Trying to determine what China is thinking at any given time is like, well, Chinese arithmetic. Why wouldn't China act aggressively to contain North Korea? The only somewhat sensible answer is to screw with the U.S., but the head whack job in charge in Pyongyang is just as likely to lob a nuke at them as us. "Vewy, vewy confoozing." (Elmer Fudd, PhD, Brookings Institute, 2006).
...For the record: Mel Brooks is one funny son of a bitch, and has been for a very long time. Suttle World wishes nothing but the best for Mr. Brooks, but dude turns 80 next week. When his unfortunate passing does come along, we may well reflect on his having been the true "king of comedy."
...US soccer marches on! Very nice: 0-2-1 with one goal scored and a tie only because of the Italian Mit)h/Wrong Way Riegeliano. Suttle World must admit to taking more interest in this World Cup since Macaroon made the quarter finals in '90 (went and bought a bag of cookies for that one---literally). While a greater appreciation for the skill level is being gained, its still a Steven Hawking kinda deal: mad game trapped inside a lifeless sport.
June 22, 2006
...The Suttle World staff is wholly to blame for the first home page debacle this week, and diligently corrected same in short order. The second and current glitch is of unknown cause, but believed to be related to a "migration" underway by Suttle World's web hosting service. Regardless, excepting the scintillating headlines of the day in news, opinion, sports and business arenas, all of the major components of Suttle World are accessible from the home page at present, ugly(ier) though it may be. There may well be an email issue as well. The back up contact is gsuttle@comcast.net .
...True darkness fell over stately Roberts/Suttle Manor around 9:15 last night. Residing less than an hour's drive from the next time zone is tolerable, but throw in changing perfectly set and functioning clocks twice yearly, and its nuts. Hackers availing themselves to twilight rates are a notable exception.
...Losing is a new experience to most now affiliated with the Braves organization, so its no surprise that they're not getting it right at the right time. Dropping their ninth straight last night to Toronto, the losing streak would have seemed to have been re-mastered. Still, the timing is wrong. Stretches such as this are traditionally saved for August where during the 70's the Braves amassed an 18-252 record. Yes, its still June and they're "not dead yet," but very close to a DNR designation. On the bright side, there is an outside possibility that one may be able to attend a game at some point in the near future sans the entire Woodstock experience.
...The current championships of baseball, basketball and hockey are held by the White Sox, Miami and Raleigh, respectively. This is weird.
...WMDs...BITD we called em CBWs (chemical-biological weapons). Regardless, it matters not what the gentle surfer's current take on the administration and the war effort may be, Suttle World would just like to toss in some inconvenient facts that are often overlooked. 1) Saddam turned over a laundry list of WMDs Iraq had in its possession after the first Gulf War. 2) Inspectors were supposed to oversee their destruction, but we all know how that went. 3) The terms of the peace agreed to after the first Gulf War (U.N. certified and all) stipulated not only the aforementioned inspections but a number of other dos and dont's for Iraq. 4) The aforementioned peace agreement gave the U.S. the right to use unilateral military action against Iraq if they were in violation of the agreement. 5) Iraq was/had been in violation of the agreement (inspections, no-fly zones, etc...) from day one of the signing of the peace agreement. Just a few friendly reminders from your pals at Suttle World.
June 21, 2006
Late Update...appears as though Suttle World's web hosting service is experiencing some minor technical glitches as they make a scheduled transition of some sort. The home page was ugly enough, but unmanageable at present. Rumble, bumble and stumble around as best you can.
...Publication this morning comes just on the heals of the official arrival of Summer at stately Roberts/Suttle Manor. Seasonal Affected Disorder (SAD) indeed---90°+, humid days and the ability to read outside without artificial light until 9:00 pm is not a normal state of affairs that trifles with Suttle World's delicate constitution. Alas, it seems to come around about this time every year, so presumably we shall prevail yet again.
...Late likely addition to the itinerary of next week's NC foray to catch Bacharach in Brevard has a stop on the return leg to behold the new "mini-Fenway" in beautiful downtown Greenville, SC. The home team Drive (don't ask---I have no clue) hosts the Lexington Legends next Wednesday for a Business Man's Special/12:05 start that coincides with our travel plans both in timing and geography.
...For the gentle
surfer's reading pleasure this morning we have yet
another installment in 
---a most insightful
commentary per: usual.
...Props to Pat Riley and the Heat, though Suttle had drifted to dreamland before the comeback was made and the title won. Further props to David Stern for swinging the hammer repeatedly to rebuild a respectable product incumbent on a Big League. And before we lock the door on the arena for the summer, there's an issue afloat as to whether or not the just completed NHL season was a success or not. Those who answer yes can make a good case, but then there's that nagging TV thing---the lifeblood of big league ball. Suttle World recalls that TV was an issue as it watched Toronto beat Montreal in game 7 to win the Cup in 1967 from a hotel room in Anaheim. Seems as though Gary Bettman did the best he could with the bad will and lack of interest with which he had to work. Great game, but poor stewardship and the inability to translate well to TV leave hockey relegated to other sport status as far as the eye can see. 30 franchises doesn't help things any. If contraction isn't on the table, then how about an AL/NL kinda deal? That or bring back Peter Puck.
June 20, 2006
...The fourth High Holy Day on the sports calendar followed by a grind it like a mother game 7 of the Stanley Cup Finals---you just can't ask for more than that sports fans. First a bit of explanation. Why wouldn't game 7 of the Stanley Cup Finals be a High Holy Day? Simple, one doesn't know if there is going to be a game 7 in any championship series. The 5 High Holy Days are circled with a Sharpie well before the calendar is turned to January and thumb tacked to the wall; and one cannot simply go circling days at one's convenience. That would be sacrilege. Props to Carolina and a title for a franchise that has often served as the Clippers/Hawks of the NHL. One of four WHA teams to merge into the NHL, the New England, come Hartford Whalers were awful, and, for the record, were the last opponent Suttle World witnessed play against the Atlanta Flames at the Omni (Howe was geezing through his last year alongside his son(s) and got an assist in the aforementioned game). They moved to Raleigh in '96, playing in Greensboro for the first year or so while a new venue was being built. They remained awful after the move and literally gave away a car at every home game one season to try to draw anybody. But today the ugly duckling is a swan, and has a nifty 34 pound silver trophy to prove it. Come to think of it, Edmonton was another of the four WHA teams to merge into the NHL in 1979. Who were the other two? Hint: Edmonton is the only one still in the same place.
...Just in time for the light summer reading season comes the first of ten texts in the mail yesterday---this particular volume weighing in at over 10 pounds and about 1500 pages. Only nine more to go for the coming semester (beanie cap and raccoon coat sold separately).
...With a day to reflect, Phil's performance on 18 Sunday surpasses Jean Van De Velde in the all time choke/Mit)hy moment in the history of golf, and rivals that of all sport.
June 19, 2006
...The fourth High Holy Day of the Sports Calendar proved more than worthy Sunday afternoon in the manner befitting a US Open---survival. Montie choked. Phil choked in a manner that would make Greg Norman proud. Ogilvy was left standing---five strokes above the score of even par Suttle World would have gladly accepted before play began.
...Duties with the mailbag and other such nonsense results in today's brief and belated publication. Suttle World Senators (1-2) page to be updated soon. Check Wiffle Atlanta for Sunday's results.
June 18, 2006---Father's Day
...Are there two 500 pound gorillas sitting about stately Roberts/Suttle Manor that Suttle World chooses to ignore today? No, the gorillas have taken their leave, and while they did indeed soil the carpet and leave a malodorous residue incumbent with such stains, there seems little need to dwell on the subject in this arena. Some quiet and reflection and healthy fellowship will no doubt be engaged in by those who dwell within the Manor's walls, but suffice to say each carries on rather well, thank you. And a happy Father's Day to all the dads who have this special day to scratch what they want when they want without being yelled at.
...To paraphrase David Allan Coe: If this aint the US Open, I'll kiss your ass. First, the important point: self promotion. Yes, it was Suttle World that said before play began Thursday that it would most enthusiastically sign a scorecard that totaled 280 and head for the clubhouse to watch TV for the four rounds. Even par would win this tournament if anyone could get there, but that would seem highly unlikely. What is likely is that today's leaderboard will resemble a stock ticker on a volatile day on Wall Street. 13 players within two strokes/one errant shot of the lead. This is why today is fourth of the five High Holy Days of the Sports Calendar.
...Two weeks shy of the half way point of the 2006 MLB season and the Braves in losing their sixth straight Saturday afternoon now trail the Mets by 13 games and the Washington Nationals by a half a game. The bullpen has blown 17 of 28 save opportunities to date, and arguably the greatest regular season run in the history of professional sports is very much in danger. Suttle World wanted a pennant race not a collapse. And lest the gentle surfer forget, the SQ (suck quotient) of inter-league play is just below that of the designated hitter.
...An errant turn en route to fetch nephew Ridge from a buddy's home Saturday morning left time for a startling observation of what is not observable: yard signs. The general primary is 30 days away and only half a dozen were counted as Suttle circumnavigated a goodly sized residential portion of DeKalb County.
June 17. 2006
...Hell's Kitchen was/is generally defined as the area between West 34th and 59th streets from 8th Avenue west to the Hudson. New York Magazine, sums up the former slum's status thusly: "Young, monied professionals and a sizable gay community have joined the blue collars and largely Latino old-timers calling Hell's Kitchen home." Its a quaint little area---a tad too quaint for some. Regardless, it is the considered opinion of Suttle World that the once infamous area of angst has metastasized to a much larger growth that can quite rightly be called Hell's County or Gwinnett. 8:45 Friday evening and the lovely traffic signage reads: "Accident I85 SB; South of Jimmy Carter Blvd...5 Lanes Closed!" (This is 15+ miles from downtown Atlanta for the non-local) There are any of a number of directions with which to run with this hideous scenario. Suffice to say Suttle World does not wish to dwell in any area where there are 5 lanes of interstate to close, and is being governed appropriately.
...Belated shout out to my new best friend Frank Budge of $imply $old---an eBay "storefront" in the long standing Embry Hills shopping center. Good show my friend---look forward to speaking with you in the coming week.
...On time shout out to cuzin Moke for his visit of yesterday evening. A good time had by all, sans the foray interrupted by the above rant. Also, props to the good folks at Sangria's in beautiful downtown Tucker for their always cheerful and stellar service even when folks bust through the door at closing time due to the above rant.
...With the caveat that the gentle surfer should do its own research and come to its own conclusions, it is Suttle World's take that the trans-fatty acid "thang" is generally disagreeable with human metabolism, and should be avoided with the same vigor as untreated water or lawsuits against KFC. Suttle World believes its caveat emptor or some such. That being said, Belgium has basically outlawed the stuff and MacDonald's can deliver an order of McNuggets with 2 grams of the crap as opposed to the 18 grams to which one is treated in the good old USA with no significant cost or quality difference. Yes, "the nattering nabobs of negativity" (Pat Buchanan wrote that speech for Spiro Agnew) that is Citizens for Science in the Public Interest is largely a group of limousine liberals that rarely avails itself to science and wouldn't know the public interest if it delivered a pizza wearing a name tag that read "Public Interest." Get to the point!!! CPSI is hideous and their lawsuit is frivolous at best, but this is how the free market place of ideas is supposed to work. Make your own call regarding whether you wish to limit or eliminate your intake of trans-fatty acids. The gentle surfers are big boys and girls. The media could help, but it presumably doesn't draw as many viewers as a car wreck. Suttle World has a hunch the framers mentioned only one specific business in the drafting of the Constitution (see Amendment I) for a reason long lost upon those involved in that particular business. We may have a winner! In the waning days of the season, Suttle comes through with the most disjointed paragraph of Spring.
...Yeah, the current spot for whomever regularly running does jog the memory for inspiration for SOTD, but regardless of the "source," can the gentle surfer honestly say they get the USRDA of Kinks in their diet? Ray's been at it for the better part of 45 years and still selling it. Rumor has it some aren't even that old.
June 16, 2006
...MONTIE! The long time Euro superstar, who also holds the world record for the number of Heimlich maneuvers performed on him, puts up the only red number of the day and leads the US Open by one stroke over 5 others who turned in very respectable even par 70's. Should the Brit hold the lead going into Sunday and Suttle World found itself in the last group of the final round, it would stop on the way to Winged Foot at Sam's Club to pick up 4 dozen donuts and a case of Twinkies for its caddie to shlep around. Snack, Montie? And a fellow can't be expected to consume all that grub without something to wash it down. My bad. Here Montie, have a Guinness. Wall to wall coverage for all four days---such a deal!
...Belated big news, the Brain Surgeons have rescheduled their Atlanta gig for August 5 at The Derby in Alpharetta. Not the coup that was the Great Wall of China pic, but getting Ross the Boss to perform wearing a Hillbilly Dictators Jihad t-shirt is the next order of business.
June 15, 2006
...Memo to any would be rough whiners: what is about to take place 10 miles from where the crew crashed on their recent NYC foray is not the Glen Campbell Open. Rather, it is the US Open Championship for which all entrants had to qualify by some means that proves beyond any reasonable doubt that they are among the best players in the world. It is Suttle World's firmly held belief that the best players in the world should be able to hit the ball straight. Hit the ball straight and the ball stays in the short grass. Keep hitting the ball in the short grass and you're gonna keep it around par, assuming you make your share of up and downs. This concept is what some golf historians believe may have been at some point referred to as course management in the ancient times/BCC (before cubic centimeters). Also, rough whiner, the USGA has had the thoughtfulness of tossing a midget kid into the mix. What's not to like?
...A reassuring well written amateur review/blog of a Bacharach show earlier this year quells the concern of yesterday with regard to the upcoming June 27 performance in beautiful Brevard, NC. Props to the world's greatest wife for the heads up.
...And, yes, for the record of the gentle surfer caught off guard, SOTD is correct with regard to the spelling of Hellacopters.
June 14, 2006
...From the mailbag this morning come a couple of items of note. First, props to the nice folks at the Brevard Music Center for their prompt reply as to where the hell my Burt Bacharach tickets are/were. Turns out they're safe and secure in the Music Center's box office and will remain there until pick up in North Carolina. As to why the weren't mailed in the first place remains a mystery, but a moot point. Also, our courageous buddies that are Cruis-O-Matic send a reminder that they will be playing this Saturday at Alamo Jack's in Newnan. Show time: 9:00. In continuing Cruis-O-Matic news, the band is still set to serve as the appetizer course for Pete Best at Smith's Olde Bar on June 30. Details at the above link.
...Speaking of Bacharach. Check that, pleading with Bacharach....Burt, its taken 40 years to get a Suttle World command performance. Don't blow it. Seems as though the super composer came out of a life long political coma just in time to drink the leftist Kool-Aid and that same has bled, like the proverbial stuck pig, over onto the latest yet unheard CD. Misguided or not, its all good as long as Suttle World gets the full schmaltzy Carnauba wax job and not a bitter old man whining about things on which he is clueless. The sad evidence of said cluelessness can be found in his blog for the Huffington Report earlier this week. Could be worse. This onset could have happened decades ago. Do You Know the Way to Leningrad doesn't roll off the tongue quite as well. Just bring the orchestra, do Pacific Coast Highway, Promises, Promises, etc... and nobody gets hurt.
...A rich and truthful tale could be woven with regard to the now postponed Suttle World Senators game in Wiffle Atlanta play this coming Sunday, but suffice to say the skipper gets his wish and will witness the entire final round of the US Open Sunday in a matter befitting a High Holy Day on the sports calendar.
...An interesting dynamic is beginning to play out as Democrats jockey for position for a run in '08, but Suttle World sees the shrewd shrew working. The conventional wisdom, as oxymoronic as the term may be, is that one runs to the left to get the nomination and then back to the center for the general election. That said, Hillary's Comrade in good standing status is not in question by members of her party. What is in doubt is her electability. Ergo, we see the Senator from New York running to the center first with regard to the war. Once proven that she can at least pretend to be centrist on some major issues, she then can move on to the above mentioned tried and true strategy. Suttle World has never maintained she isn't smart, just an evil Socialist.
June 13, 2006
...Memo to Rep. Goodlatte, (R-VA) and his co-sponsors: while your patronizing paternalistic motivations are quaint on some level, Suttle World would like to pause to let you in on a dirty little secret: we can wipe our own asses, thank you. Goodlatte has moved a bill out of the Judiciary Committee and a full vote on the floor of the House is expected later this week to further regulate/outlaw online poker and other gambling sites. The drunk driving, whore mongering former Attorney General Janet Reno ran this up the flag pole during the second Clinton administration and it went over about as well as the Illian Gonzales raid. Unfortunately, now that the "conservatives" on the other side of the aisle have taken up the cause, the legislation is expected to pass. Res ipsa loquitor with regard to the merits of the arguments about such laws. The party of "small government" can't be bothered with a war, $2.5 trillion budgets, $8-10 trillion in debt and other matters enumerated in the Constitution. No, instead they turn their eyes to folks dropping $25 of the allowance the imperial federal government lets them keep from their own earnings at a poker table. BTW, Suttle World's internet bookie's line on putting the toothpaste back in the tube at 30:1.
...Meanwhile in the saner private sector, the nation's finest championship readies to begin competition Thursday when the U.S. Open tees off at Winged Foot---culminating Sunday in the fourth of the five High Holy Days on the sports calendar with the final round. The gentle surfer shall find no Tiger this or Phil that or which rough is tall where for now. Instead Suttle World shall bide its time and wait until they start whacking em around ("hey, you boys hurry it up down there") before beginning commentary. The exception is one preliminary note that takes us back to the betting cage. The aforementioned sports book lists Phil winning the Grand Slam at 100:1. Phil's mama wouldn't take that kind of action. Winning three more regular tour events at 100:1 is an unattractive wager, much less three more majors. In fact, skip the sports book. Suttle World will gladly take all the action the gentle surfer wants and offer 125:1 on the proposition. Just place your Paypal wagers here.
...The clock is ticking, so get your orders in now for Father's Day delivery from Suttle World Stuff. The pleasant brown man in the brown uniform driving the brown truck delivered a brown cardboard box to the doors of stately Roberts/Suttle Manor yesterday, and the merch checks out pretty well. Any flaws are more the fault of Suttle World's "art" work---an issue that will be addressed in good time. Til then, the coast is clear, especially in the coffee mug department. The t-shirts look pretty good too, but will be punched up when the aforementioned artwork gets a redo in appropriate DPI, pixel count, etc...
June 11, 2006
...Victory! Jon Yardley evens his record at 1-1, nephew Ridge gathers a bushel basket of RBIs to accompany his sterling defense, and even grandpa makes a contribution at the plate AND in the field as the Suttle World Senators take their first win of the season, pushing their record to 1-2 with a 20-10 drubbing of the Pirates. Hey, we play in a band box---folks are going to score some runs. Next up: somebody next Sunday, and this time Suttle World is fairly sure the schedule says 4:00.
...Tennis seems to be getting a clue. Previously stipulated is the fact that Suttle World finds the French Open the only tennis that's watchable due to the slower clay surface. Seems as though Wimbledon will use heavier balls and a thicker grass this year in an attempt to slow down that which is now literally unwatchable (and why does Gate's dictionary recognize unwatchable and not watchable? Another disgruntled v. gruntled deal afoot here Suttle World suspects).
...Memo to Georgia Perimeter College's Nursing Program: Suttle World is most hopeful that you guys do a better job in the clinical world than administrative. Nonetheless, despite the ineptitude and seeming apathy of some individuals, Suttle World will cheerfully, albeit hastily, step, fetch, pay, turn its head and cough, etc.. in rapid compliance with that which must be done to be "in" come fall. The acceptance is flattering. The aforementioned ineptitude is truly a tad disturbing.
June 11, 2006
...Wiffle Atlanta resumes play this afternoon at Tucker Middle School where the 0-2 Suttle World Senators send opening day starter Jon Yardley to the mound against the, to date, equally dreadful Pirates. Its the nightcap, starting at 4:00, and at this writing, some tickets are still available.
...French Open Finals set to start in a couple of hours. In the bigger picture department, this is truly a compelling match up. Federer may well be the best player in the history of the game playing against Johnny, Clay, Nadal, but still nobody cares. At least on the clay surface one has the opportunity to actually see the ball on occasion.
...Speaking of nobody caring, rumor has it the World Cup continues with a match today between Mexico and Iran. Tough call.
...Shout out to cuzin Joel in SoCal for his shout out yesterday morning. On reflection, Suttle World has a suggestion on where to start once the ad is answered and various positions filled. Could be a brilliant notion---could be dumber than dirt, but... More later.
...The U.S. Department of Agriculture has confirmed two cases of mad cow disease in the country over the past several days, but Senator Clinton and Representative Pelosi are expected to make speedy recoveries and return to their Capitol Hill offices soon.
June 10, 2006
...Yes its the big
day boys and girls. Step right up!
Step right up. Yes, my friends, you may now
each own a little piece of Suttle World for your
very own by shopping the at SUTTLE
WORLD
STUFF
T shirts, coffee
mugs, coasters, baby bibs and even outerwear for
the homosexual dog crowd is now available for the
gentle surfer's shopping pleasure, all proudly
embossed with the world famous Suttle World or
Hillbilly Dictators Jihad logos. Judicial
notice is served that the store is in its
"beta" stage. It is fully
functional and the third party handler believed to
be of good repute by word of mouth, but caveat
emptor until further notice. Yes, it
probably would have been a good idea to wait until
Suttle World's own order arrived to check out just
how bad this crap looks, but damn the torpedoes!
Full giddiness ahead!
...Big day indeed on the old sports calendar as well. Post season college baseball, the French Open finals, the World Cup, the Belmont, the Stanley Cup finals plus the regular programming make for a couch potato's dreamland (literally in the case of the World Cup and French Open). None is terribly compelling in and of itself but there's something of a synergy to all the happenings.
...Speaking of thoroughbred racing, Suttle World only beats this dead horse once a year or so, and typically around Belmont time, so just push forward if you've already "been there." Suttle World does not fancy itself as God's gift to the sport of thoroughbred racing, but is probably in the 95th percentile with regard to knowledge of the game, largely because nobody gives a damn. After WW II there were three sports in the good old USA: baseball, boxing and horse racing. The last two have done a damn good job at relegating their respective sports to the relevance of box lacrosse. Baseball has tried mightily, but has so far been unsuccessful in destroying itself. Anyway, the dirty little secret is that the Triple Crown races in general, and today's Belmont in particular due to the class of the starters, are the equivalent of high school track meets. Three year olds are still developing horses, and asking these adolescent critters to carry 126 pounds a mile and a half in June is ridiculous. Whining over. The fact of the matter is that several tracks still run decent sized fields that provide good wagering opportunities. That coupled with the being able to subscribe to a personalized DRF and other resources on the web and TV, one who has an ongoing interest in the game can be involved in an up close and somewhat personal matter.
June 9, 2006
...A crowd of at least 30 showed last night at the Star Bar for the Rubber City Rebels, yet, in spite of the disappointing turnout, the boys from Akron sold it, and one cannot ask any more of any performer. A few pics for now, and a more in depth review as the symptoms of sleep deprivation ease.
...How about this? Us ugly Americans will lay off the soccer smack if the Euros will lay on some deodorant. Deal?
June 8, 2006
...Yes, the big day
prior to the big night featuring Akron's own
Rubber City Rebels Atlanta appearance has finally
arrived. The event has been pimped as much
as the law will allow, and the gentle surfer who
wanders into Suttle World frequently is well aware
that Suttle World rarely geeks over events to this
degree. Those who choose to attend have
little to lose---its cheap, close and should be
mercifully early given the weeknight date.
Those who choose to eschew the opportunity will,
unfortunately, miss out on the Ohio boys making
what Suttle World believes to be a statement of
great social import: have some fun, for
Christ's sake.
" I don't wanna be a punk no more
I don't wanna be a punk no more
I don't like your spit
I don't like your hate
I need more than ten
People to think I'm great..."
"Old school rules, fool!" Great
rock n roll. Great shtick. Next up,
Burt Bacharach.
...From the mailbag this morning comes a reply from Mo, mascot of the Montgomery Biscuits, a AA ball club in the Southern League. The gentle surfer who has mustered the courage to view this hideous spectacle depicted in the above link can well understand the confusion at stately Roberts/Suttle Manor as to exactly what the hell Mo is. Long story short: we went straight to the source, inquiring of Mo as to whether he was a mucus membrane or simply phlegm, and much to Suttle World's surprise a cheerful reply was received. Everyone involved in minor league ball busts their ass EFD for chump change, and yet, these nice folks take the time to respond to a sarcastic, albeit diplomatic, inquiry in the spirit in which it was sent. Good job, and good for business, as Suttle World will now undoubtedly shlep to Montgomery to hook up with Mo.
...An egregious oversight on the part of Suttle World, leaves it no choice but to belatedly commemorate the death of Billy Preston earlier this week. When Suttle World thinks of the keyboard the names of Jerry Lee Lewis, Ray Charles, Ronnie Argent and Billy Preston come to mind in the distinctive style department. Like the others, Preston's play could be identified with ease in any of the many great tunes on which he performed; and "Everybody Likes Some Kind of Music" remains a classic, must have album. We have lost a great one. And while we're on the belated obituary page, Suttle World also notes the passing of former MLB umpire Eric Greg. Talk about ambivalence (see yesterday's SSC)---Suttle World always admired Greg for pioneering as a black guy in the very white world of blue uniforms, being candid about his constant battle with his weight and for being a pretty damn good umpire. Of course, all that changed in September of 1997 when Greg gained the dubious distinction of calling the worst game from behind the plate in major league history and vanquished the Braves from post season play in the process.
June 7, 2006
...First, a short lecture on the language. While this is somewhat akin to Jeffrey Dahmer lecturing on table manners, Suttle World believes to have this particular point nailed down. Ambivalence and indifference are not the same thing. Indifference = apathy. Ambivalence is a state where, for lack of better terms, love and hate have a Mexican standoff within an individual regarding a particular person, place or thing/notion. The point here is that Suttle World is experiencing extreme ambivalence with regard to John Entwhistle, having witnessed the wonderful live Who footage last night on PBS (more about them later). No human who has ever picked up a four stringed instrument has played it as well as our fallen hero, and, yet, grandpa failed to heed to Surgeon General's warning that 60 year olds getting coked up with a hooker in a Vegas suite is hazardous to one's health. Suttle World wants the Ox back so that the greatest band that ever roamed the planet could still be intact (Moon died 30 years ago, we're over that one). The love/hate relationship can be most difficult, but Suttle World takes solace in the word of Dan Rather: "courage."
...On to the PBS deal. Last night was the only one in recollection where sitting through the begging portions of the interrupted Who stuff was tolerable (and that even included Mara Davis, perhaps the most tedious ATL radio "personality"). Nonetheless, a naked Claudia Schiffer pleading for a donation will not bring Suttle World to the phone during pledge week or at any other time. So long as Suttle World is an involuntary contributor via taxes collected at the point of a gun, there shall be no voluntary bucks coming. Selling one minute of advertising per hour would pay for PBS. Shut up, run the Ford spot and maybe Suttle World will break off a check. Til then: I got your Frontline right here. And for the gentle surfer who believes it to be perfectly fine for the government to own and operate a media organ, please remember to renew your Gerbels fan club membership before it expires.
...From the mailbag this morning comes word from Albert Bouchard requesting that Suttle World reply with suggestions for a suitable venue for the now cancelled Brain Surgeons date in Atlanta. That pretty much says it all. Today, Suttle World must complete its reply to Steven Hawking regarding our thread about busting the whole time/space continuum deal.
...Rubber City Rebels at the Star Bar Thursday, 9:00. Guys free, girls $2. A yuck before you get in the door! This has HUGE potential.
June 6. 2006
...Be the gentle surfer ignorantly terrified or glibly amused, 95%+ will make some reference to today's date further proving the Suttle Dog Food Theory of Life in that said 95%+ will have the leisure to devote to thought over a coincidence of the calendar. Beats the hell out of shopping at the local landfill for lunch.
...In the silver lining department, first the bad news. It would appear as though the Brain Surgeons have cancelled their Atlanta appearance along with several others of similar date and geography. The good news is that they've added a second Nashville date---a reasonably proximate locale and with the promised appearance of Ross the Boss web maven Dawn Owar. Any other Jihadists up for the short roadie in early August (4-5)?
...Speaking of Jihadists, memo to Steven Moreau of Creative Loafing: please note the home page of Suttle World and the lovely "copyright 2003" pronouncement up to and including the Hillbilly Dictators Jihad. "The Jihad of the Jam Bands" indeed, you Jason Blair wanna be you! Get Manitoba's lawyer on the phone! Seems as though Mr. Moreau thieves from Suttle World for a peg on which to hang his rundown of the Atlanta summer music "scene." And if plagiarism weren't bad enough, the Hillbilly Dictators Jihad is further disgraced by the acts listed. Judicial notice is served that Suttle World is supposed to really like the Dave Matthews Band, but still doesn't exactly understand why. Prepare for a closed circuit communiqué. Also props to the world's greatest wife for bringing such things to the attention of Suttle World.
...Rubber City Rebels: B (blowout) -60 hours and counting.
June 5, 2006
...A travesty I tell you! A crime against all that is good, sacred, honorable and Wiffle, but props to cuzin Bill for representing off the reserve list. Yes, the Suttle World Senators fell to 0-2 yesterday, and while it may walk away shaking its head ruefully, it walks away head held high (shaking to and fro makes for a "silly walk" deal working with all the mixed metaphors) and with a damn good scouting report. Team trainer, Dirk Bremen, reports Mr. leg to be a bit less than happy in his last briefing.
...Shout out to Ross the Boss web maven Dawn Owar for the back and forth of the past week. Suttle World and/or the Hillbilly Dictators Jihad greatly looks forward to making your acquaintance---perhaps here in the ATL for the Brain Surgeons gig as you had mentioned as possibly being on your itinerary.
...Is there really any choice but to quarantine the District of Columbia and fumigate it until all life forms have perished? True, some might find genocide a bit harsh, but we're running out of options here boys and girls. And spare me your admonitions about participation in the democratic process. The gentle surfer is reminded that Suttle World in endowed (by God and/or nature; pick a card, any card) with inalienable rights that require no shlep to the polling place. When that notion was first put forward, a revolutionary war was necessary to guarantee same. Suttle World is not advocate. It was Jefferson who said "from time to time, the tree of liberty must be fertilized with the blood of revolution (close)."
June 4, 2006
...Wifflers unite. With nephew Ridge summering in Cartersville and surrounds for the weekend, the Suttle World Senators find themselves a man short heading into Wiffle Atlanta action this afternoon. More details as they break.
...If water instead of a scalpel were required gear, Suttle World speculates that there would by now exist a large sect of born again Jews. This, of course, requires the gratuitous repetition of the next Governor of Texas, Kinky Friedman's, line that "we Jews have no problem with Baptists. We just think they don't hold 'em under the water long enough." Something to think about this Sunday morning in the hectic world in which we live. "This is Suttle World, and that's straight from the heart."
...Stupid Braves.
...The NBA final should really be interesting assuming games will start before midnight and TV will allow for the flow of same without constant interruption. Good game, bigger than life, real life cartoon characters (and that's the coach with the oil spill on his dome)---you've also got the Shaq deal, etc... Again, one hopes TV will allow the drama play out. On the ice---sorry, while Suttle World has a deep abiding respect for the Stanley Cup playoffs/finals and players selling it like none other regardless of the sweaters worn, Edmonton/Carolina just doesn't get Suttle World excited in the least. Some will be viewed (game 1 Monday), and Suttle World welcomes being taken hostage, but has little fear of same.
June 3, 2006
...Wandered off to do some errands that turned more extensive, forgetting to pull the sacred Suttle World publication switch. Better late than never, excepting Gino Vannelli, but that's another story...
...Great to hook up with cuzin Paul yesterday morning at Hartsfield---more than compensating for a couple excruciating commutes in and around the metro area of late---worthwhile, but tedious nonetheless. And whine as Suttle World does regularly of traffic and congestion, it learns this week that in the good old days of Hell's Kitchen & the lower east side, that it was more densely populated than Calcutta in the early 20th century. Just further replication for the Suttle Dog Food Theory of Life.
...A belated AMF to the Gladiators, but given Suttle World had signed their death certificate following game four... Still, one hell of a year, equaling the number of goals witnessed at the Arena at Gwinnett this season---opening night; 0-0 tie decided by shoot out; Glads 0-5 Whoever 1-5. Still the best sports value in town along with Tech baseball to which Suttle World never seems to avail itself, post season or otherwise.
...Speaking of NCAA post season baseball...Suttle World has no clue as to how the field is determined, but there does not seem to be an automatic bid for the Atlantic 10 champion. A few clicks could reveal that to be the case, or that a school that plays only Division I in baseball is in the conference (Winthrop?)---sorta like football in that league. Some do, many don't (see GW), some shouldn't (see Temple).
...Rare rain out for the Braves last night. The gentle surfer that kept checking back from the Heat win may have noticed that it was not that bad, just bad enough. The high-tech drainage system means the playing surface is always in good shape, but... A day-night double header is set for today, but well worth the wait given the weather has finally broken with breathable non store bought air available for the great unwashed. Its also a smart call on the Braves part. Suttle World would wager that a full quarter of the 40,000 tix sold for last night's game were to folks from out of town who had bought in advance for that particular date. At least its only delayed 18 hours instead of blowing a family weekend jaunt.
June 2, 2006
...Friday, a great day to travel an hour or so and stumble around at the airport. No, not to leave unattended bags and stand back to watch the commotion (though it is fun)---this time its to meet with dear cuzin Paul who has a three hour layover at Hartsfield in his trek back to Vermont. And with a fifth runway now in use, surely there's room to put 9 holes in and around them big old roads.
...You always see something different every time you go to the ballpark be it in person or via the miracle of TV. A 1-4-6-3 double play? Suttle World has never witnessed such a pinball like event in his nearly 40 years of acute study of the game, but that's exactly what happened last night in or about the bottom of the seventh inning as the Braves played in Arizona. Everyone's seen a ball glance off a pitcher, be picked by another infielder who relays to first to beat the runner (1-6-3 or some such), but a double play?!!!! Unfortunately the game's outcome was not as entertaining.
...A heads up just because I'm a hell of a guy. A letter from a certain institution of "higher learning" better arrive and be written to my satisfaction today, or said institution should consider beefing up its security budget. There's no bell tower, but there is a five story building that has a lovely roof. Just cooperate and nobody gets hurt.
...To paraphrase incredibly successful syndicated radio personality Al Franken, Al Gore is A Big Fat Fucking Moron. And for the gentle surfer who eschews fact, logic and the scientific method, to invest in any notion of man made "global warming," Suttle World offers the following advice: MOVE! Let's say Gore's right (let's also say that Suttle World has great intellect and insight as long as we're in shopping in the wishin' and hopin' department). Just back away quickly from the soon to be affected/flooded areas. Aside from the global warming idiocy, anyone who invests directly in the path of destruction should get exactly what they deserve. Actually they get more than they deserve. Highly tax payer subsidized flood insurance for those who think it would be quaint to live in a 5 year flood plane...low interest loans for those devastated by the hurricane that struck right where a similar storm came ashore 50 years prior and here comes FEMA, Wal-Mart and Home Depot with hand outs, 3% loans and $2000 ATM cards. Now, should stately Roberts/Suttle Manor have the unfortunate literal melt down in the form of a fire overnight, would it not be equally as disastrous for the denizens of the Manor? Yeah, bless their hearts, the Red Cross and Salvation Army would probably show, and thanks, but we've got insurance to take care of our immediate housing needs. FEMA would not show. There would be no ATM cards or 3% money. This has never added up in Suttle World, and explains why more shopping for intellect and insight is required. eBay here I come.
June 1, 2006
...Huge news...even better, huge, good news emanates this morning like a beacon from stately Roberts/Suttle Manor with the most important music announcement since the most recent "Abu, Dude, Where's My Car, Hajj" of over 18 months ago: June 27, Brevard Music Center, Brevard, NC---Burt Bacharach!!!! First, its Bacharach, a huge fan of whom Suttle World has unabashedly been for nearly 40 years, and has never seen perform. Second, Suttle World will indeed see Mr. Bacharach in Brevard---a town about a half hour southwest of Asheville and approximately the size of a Buick. They do evidently have a lovely 1000 seat or so concert venue. Brevard is also about 10 miles from the western North Carolina satellite headquarters of Suttle World, meaning the event shall also include the hospitality and company of dear old mom, as three ducats were purchased last night. This truly is a "higher spiritual plane/That its so high I can't explain" kinda deal. No, the gentle surfer is assured that Suttle World, the leader of the mighty Hillbilly Dictators Jihad is absolutely giddy with delight at being able to see one of its all time favorite artists, of such notoriety in such an intimate setting, surrounded by the best terra firma on the planet. Chortle if you will. Suttle World knows the chortles well. It is all too familiar with the chortles, of Bacharach and Gladys Knight and Kool and the Gang (BITD) to name but a few. Suttle World also knows how all now view the scoreboard and has become accustomed to the humble groveling of the former chortler. This shall fall in the fun department. Fun: often forgotten, always underrated.
...Also welcome on the horizon is the distinct possibility of a rendezvous with cuzin Paul tomorrow morning as he endures a three hour layover at Hartsfield, returning to his beloved Montpelier---just in time to congratulate the June Composter of the Month. Look for Google ads on all types of composting gear and know-how in the coming days at the top of this page on a browser near you.
...Braves and Mets win...four and a half games separate the two. As cover your face horrifying as the Braves have played at times this year, a pennant race does indeed seem to be shaping up, and it is for such things Suttle World has longed for many a season. By the way, inter-league play remains the dumbest deal on the planet and makes a mockery of the 162 game schedule that sets baseball apart from all other sports. But, hey, they've been playing that 10 guy softball in the American League for over 30 years now. Here's an idea: have Paris Hilton pitch a real inning for each franchise during the season---especially during inter-league play. Imagine what it could do for the game.
...Meanwhile dear friend Sal Cincotta toils in his 30th something year with the Warrendale Little League. Suttle World serves judicial notice that it is behind in its yearly Cubbies duties and plans to remedy same ASAP. Major leaguers, as Dizzy Dean would say, wouldn't know the cut off man from the man in the moon, but Suttle World can easily envision Coach Sal running practice and handling a game. Teaching a love of the game from the fundamentals up with good cheer and encouragement, all the while over worrying deeply about the fragile psyches of the little snots...errr....kids put before him. Props to you buddy. It strikes Suttle World as a calling much akin to the clergy or some such. To have such a positive impact on so many kids who so desperately need positive impressions with such a great conduit. Father Flannigan would be proud. Like cool, man. And thanks for the tunes so graciously sent this week. Rubber City Rebels baby! Star Bar, June 8. Bet there! This may be the best $10 (guess-not posted) buy of the summer music season along with wherever the Brain Surgeons end up. Hey, at least they got Nashville pinned down. We know how to get there if necessary/desired.
...Belated feel better wishes to neighbor Deidre (I know I promised not to ever misspell it again, but that spelling is in the "dictionary" (to which I did enter the proper spelling), and....) who is recovering from nasty spill earlier this week. Trust all is as well as can be expected, and delighted the learn that the injuries sustained were no more drastic than perceived from a brief briefing. Suttle World is somewhat familiar with the consequences of a simple misstep, and stands at the ready to assist in any manner that may be desired during your infirmiry. Memo to down the street: please send current email contact at your leisure. Seems as though one bounces back. Can't imagine why in this day of the sublime perfect environment featuring familial peace, love and understanding. Well, as Aristotle wrote: "shit happens." No, Suttle World has no ideas what that means, but it flows reasonably well for a Thursday morning.
...One last thing. For the record Suttle World was all over the cornholing craze over a year ago, before the national media has just not begun to give this game exposure. This still has incredible money making potential.
...Spanning the globe...from grungy punk rockers to Bacharach...from the insult of sacrilege upon the greatest game invented by man to he nobility still contained therein...to the agony of cornholing its the wide Suttle World of today.
You Can
Save rock n roll!
